Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Underworld: An Underachiever

Some things go together well: peanut butter and chocolate, for example, or pizza and beer. Action vampire movies are a genre to which I never quite cottoned because I don't think they were meant for each other. Vampire movies are ultimately about (un-?) human contact, passion and sexuality, and action movies are their antithesis. Shoot-em-up, blow-em-up action flicks are often difficult to reconcile with good storytelling.

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usAn unpolished Kate Beckinsale in 1990.

Underworld was a decent enough movie and Kate Beckinsale is a pretty enough A-list actress, so I shouldn't complain too much when big-time Hollywood royalty play one of the un-dead. Maybe it will encourage any number of other starlets to follow her example. But therein lies some of the movies' problems; she barely had fangs, she barely used them, she never turned anyone into a vampire or bit a neck. For me it's barely a vampire movie. She didn't set a good example for Anne Hathaway as Dracula's Daughter in my fantasy movie, at all.

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usFangs good enough for apples and carrots.

Undoubtedly, Kate's body is smokin' hot and that leather outfit was great. For a while. Until she wore the same thing through rain, mud, gunfights, fire, explosions and never a wardrobe change.

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usFree Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usFree Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us
She wore the same outfit the entire movie.

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usBy the end of the movie she looked as if she could use a nice warm shower.

As happens so many times, leave it to the yeoman actress who gets second billing to take up the star's slack and deliver the goods.

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usSophia Myles shows some decent fangage.

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